When I rushed in 2003 at the University of Alabama one hot week in August, there were no #OOTDs, Tik Tok, or social media for that matter. Facebook wasn’t invented for another two years. At the time I didn’t even know what Old Row was (found out after I joined a sorority). I didn’t know a lot about what it meant to be a sorority at UA. I had an older friend from back home that helped me navigate recs from the ladies in our hometown that had been in sororities. She also warned me about door songs and gave me some ideas on what to wear for each day. Thanks, Megan, for your help! A lot of my #OOTD would have gone something like this, “my dress is from the Limited or gasp from Cato’s, my shoes are hand me downs from my sister, and my pearl earrings (my favorite) were a graduation present from the ladies I worked with in high school.

One thing I struggled with was that in just a week’s time I was supposed to be able to find a sorority that I could call home. I didn’t think a week was long enough for me to make some magical connection with complete strangers. Most of my best friends I had known since 2nd grade. Still, I was intrigued and as the week went on and I went through the process of selecting houses or houses dropping me as I must have not fit their criteria (whatever that was-maybe they spotted a CATO tag on one of my OOTD’s). I witnessed some girls fall apart when a house dropped them. I never felt devastated when a house dropped me because I really did not know what to expect during this process (ignorance is bliss).

At the end of week, I had three houses for serious night (now called preference night). I knew from orientation this meant I would get a bid. If you had less than 3 you weren’t guaranteed a bid. I also knew they discouraged suiciding. Suicide is what happens when a girl puts only one house down at the end of Series Night which may lead to no bid. I was happy with the remaining 3 houses. During Serious Night, you are to reflect on what house you think is best for you and where you want to spend your college career. I noticed a lot of girls going through rush crying at this event. I guess they had found their place, but I still didn’t feel like I had made that serious of a connection yet.

Finally, I get to the DZ house, and meet Lindsay Beth. I ask her if we have to talk so seriously. She laughed, and said “No.” As we talked further, I realized I found someone I could actually connect with and talk to beyond the “Where are you from?” “Where’s that?” “Do you live in Tut?” Through my rush process, I always threw people off with answers to these questions because 1). No one knew where Demopolis was or really had even heard of it. 2). I lived in an apartment. It was as though their programmed, well-rehearsed responses did not fit in my narrative. 

The next day I received a bid from DZ. As girls ran screaming from Bryant Denny, I walked nervously to the DZ house. DZ had not been my first choice, but I was not disappointed. I was just nervous because there was no one from my home town, which was also kind of freeing as you get to meet new people. As rounded the corner, headed to the DZ house, I spotted her holding my name. It was Lindsay Beth from the night before! Relieved, I joined her at the house, so glad to see a familiar face!

We became instant friends and she became my big sister in the sorority. I had accidentally found my home. When I wasn’t sure how to find it, it found me and with the the help of a special person, Lindsay Beth. She is one of the kindest and most non -judgmental people I know. She welcomed me with open arms and still remains a dear friend of mine.

I’m thankful for no social media during my time rushing UA. I am thankful connections were made genuinely and that in going through I didn’t pressure myself to be something I wasn’t. I am glad I didn’t decide I had to have certain Greek letters to guarantee my happiness. Most of all, I am thankful for Lindsay Beth.