I am here.
Recently, I graduated to going every 4 months to the oncologist, a small victory of sorts. You see, Cancer is a friend that hangs out around even long after they are “gone.” In June, it will be 3 years since I completed all treatments. It’s hard to imagine that it has been 3 years.
So now that I’ve moved into a somewhat normal life again, I find myself busily working on the house, making up for lost time. I find myself making new dreams.
There’s also a real sense of before and after cancer. Although as I said, she’s still lingering in the dead of night when I can’t sleep or in the corners of my mind.
She doesn’t completely control me. It’s something I’ve learned to accept. I hope that I’m a better person through all this, but I know I am far from perfect. I still make mistakes, eat too many carbs, and can always improve.
The one thing though that I am much better at is appreciation for every big and little thing. My nephew graduated recently, and I think I am here. My youngest hits the t-ball (not off tee), and again, I think I am here, witnessing it all.
Thank you, God, for perspective and being here. We are going bowling today. I can’t wait to slip those shoes on, laugh, and play arcade games.
I am here. I am here. She’s here, but I am more here than she is. She has not defined me but made me see more clearly.
The Peach 